Thoughts

Breast Cancer has invaded my body, but it need not invade my spirit. There may be scars on my chest, but there need not be scars on my heart. . . . . . Judy Kneece

Saturday, July 31, 2010

wow what a week

Well, I've not had a good week and to top it off I didn't sleep at all last night, I mean not one wink. Too much on my mind. Blood count was very low yesterday and I had to get a shot to make my bone marrow produce more white blood cells and get this, the side effects are that my bones are gonna hurt for 4 - 5 days. Yea, hurt enough to take pain pills. Well, that might have had something to do with no sleep last night and my poor hubby has a cold so, I slept with a mask on so I'd not get his cold, again wonder why I didn't get any sleep. But, I did feel good enough to fix my sweetie breakfast. Glad he can only handled one scramble egg and one slice of toast and coffee. That wasn't hard to fix at all. I feel a little bit better today. Haven't started hurting yet. Glad I'm not going back to work until late October. Getting over Chemo takes most all of my energy.

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Another one Bites the Dust!!!

Well, had my second big treatment yesterday. Only four more to go. So happy they only come every three weeks. Takes a few days to hit and last about four days and they I start feeling better. The small weekly ones aren't nothing. Just aches and pains with a headache. Tylenol seems to help that for the most part and rest. Rest is my friend.

Well Wednesday night after church Heath Saved my head. I tried to give me a Mohawk, A on one side and OU on the other side. He wouldn't do any of those things. See if I do it for him next time he wants a Mohawk. Actually he shaves his own now so I don't get to try the fun stuff any more and Jesse had Heath save his also. Now he used to want to try some wild hair styles. That was all so fun. Kept Scoff on pins and needles though. He always thought we were gonna leave the crazy stuff.

Loosing my hair, well not as big shock as I thought. Except when I see myself in the mirror and have to take a double take to make sure it's me in there. My body temperature is cooler. I wore my wig the work the Thursday. Everyone loved it. Said it made me look 25 years younger. Well, now I think I just found my hair style when my hair grows out. I wore my bandanna yesterday for treatment day. It was more comfy than wig. I think I'll wear them more often. We went to eat out last night and thought would want me to wear my wig. But, he surprised me and didn't say anything. SCheck Spellingo, guess he's gonna let me wear what I want. He is a lot more vein than I am. Silly boy.

Doctor wants me to quit work until my big treatments are finished. He said I am absolutely not to have any STRESS at all in my life. My body needs all of it's energy to get well. Chemo and Jesus are doing their part in this Journey and I am gonna have to do my part. So, I'm gonna call Monday and check to see if I can get my short term disability rein acted and go from there. Doc said that I'm gonna feel worse with each big treatment and will need all the good days to recover and replenish my body. Silly me I was hoping that with each one I'd handle it easier and the worst was behind me. Shows you what I know. I've decided that he's had more school than I and I'm gonna listen to him and do as he says.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Gettin about time

Well, it's about time to shave my head. It is really getting sore and it's falling out. It's amazing how dead on those Oncologist are about every step I make. Heath is coming over this weekend to shave it. At least I have some cool head gear to wear. I love my new cowboy hat. Don't know if I have many shirts to go with it. It has turquoise on it. But, it is a cool hat and I'm gonna wear it a whole lot.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

work

Finished my first week back at work and I survived. It was so tiring. I finished my second small Chemo yestrday. Did well. I get my second big one next Friday. Oh, not looking forward to that. Must rest a lot this week and get ready for that.

I need to go shop for some capri's today. I wore my best ones yesterday to work. I think I may have been too casual. Oh well. They didn't send me home. Only because they are desperate to have me back. It's good to be needed.

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Finally

Finally had my first Chemo Treatment yesterday. It lasted 6 hours. Wow, that was a day let me tell ya. Scott was with me most of the time. He took a lunch break and brought me back a Bruce Terry hamburger and an unsweet tea. That was so good. It hit the spot.

I go once a week for chemo. Only the ever third one will last a long time, about 4 1/2 hours. the rest of them will only be a hour.

I'm trying to drink lots of fluids. That is hard for me. I don't like to drink so much. I'm feeling good, taking my anti nausea meds as prescribed so I'm hoping I don't get sick. Have a slight headache too. But, other thank that it's not too bad.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Good Days!

I'm having a very good day today. Drain came out yesterday. I don't like those at all. Can't sleep on my side at all with them in. Oncologist on Friday. I've gotten so much love, food and prayers from my friends and family. Oh, my I'm so blessed. The best part is this has shown my Mom God's face through all this. If this is all for her benefit then, it's all worth the price it has cost me.

Friday, June 25, 2010

Come on Already!!!!!

Well, my last posting I was going to have Chemo, I had a bad report from my PET Scan Results. They found 4 spots in my lymth nodes which had tested negative four weeks earlier. So, the Surgeon and Oncologist both thought it best if they were removed without further adu. So, I went in for surgery a week ago yesterday and sure enough they were cancerous. They were hoping it was going to be bruising from the first surgery but, I wasn't that lucky. Dr. Hunton said that one of the lympth nodes that he removed looked "wicked". There he goes using THAT work again. Dr. Mackey uses it alot too. Evidently my tumor and these lympth nodes are WICKED looking under the microscope. But, they were all removed along with a slugh of others as well as he scrapped around under the left arm area. And he didn't warn me how much this was going to hurt afterwards. I can usually prepare myself for pain if they just inform me of how bad it's gonna be. So, I'm taking a few pain meds with sleeping pills in order to sleep at night. Sleep doesn't come easy. Darn it, I can't even sleep during the day.

I'm thinking these spots that appeared on my lympth nodes grew from the time I had my bi-lateral Mastectomy and my PET Scan. Dr. Hunton and Dr. Mackey were both so surprised that they were there. All other Organ's Lungs, and Heart look great. So, I'm hoping Dr. Hunton will release me soon so I can get on with the Chemo already. I feel like a bump on a log, just lying around.

Thanks to all of you who have brought me food, gifts, books, cards, phone calls, prayers and most of all prayers. I just couldn't have made it this far without you and your encouraging actions. You are the best. My new Cancer friends have come out of the wood work to help me. God has send me some special people in my time of need. He knows and understands what we all need.

My Mom has been so sweet to help me all this past week. Making my bed, filling my Tea glass and Oh, do I ever have a great recipe for a Virgin Bongo Tea. I'm not gonna post it unless someone asked me to...I'm gonna see how many read my blog. It is awesome.

Thanks for your continued support. Like I was telling my friend Dee, I feel like I've Stalled out over the open ocean. Just continue to pray for me. I know you will.

God has even taken the desire to ride away for right now, cause he knows and I know that it's impossible for the time being. But, I know when the time is right he'll bring it back.

Scott is getting started on the Water Line over at the Little Place. Can you imagine. Wonder what Mamaw & Papaw are thinking? If there is worrying in Heaven (which I don't think there is) but, if there were Mamaw would be wringing her hands together right now saying "Oh my Lord What are We Gonna Do"? Well, Mamaw, it's gonna be alright and more happier times are a coming and we are going to have city water!!!!!!

Love ya all.
Tink

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Getting Ready

I'm trying to anyway. Thank you to all my friends who have offered to take me to my Chemo treatments. Wow, what friends. Scott is going to take me Tuesday since it's going to be my first time. I'm praying that the side effects won't be bad and that I'll be able to drive myself there and back home. I know it's going to be long wait and I hate for anyone to have to wait that long. We'll see how it goes. Pray for side effects to be not so bad.

My Sister Chic's laid hands on me this morning in Sunday School. If you've never had that done - wow it is so powerful. Hope you never have the need but, if you do I hope you have a wonderful Christian Support System like I do. Bro. Bob's sermon this morning was so comforting and I know my sickness will glorify His Kingdom and my testimony is going to be something.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

On our way:(

Well, we went to the Oncologist yesterday and now have a game plan. I start Chemo next week. Will hit it hard every 3 weeks for 6 cycles and then continue with easier dose of Chemo for the duration of treatment that will last for a total of 1 year. So, here we go. I have a lot to do this week, blood work, heart and PET scan and on top of that we have to drive to Dallas Thursday night for a early Friday morning appointment to remove some fluid from my LapBand.

One of the awful side effects of Chemo is that I'm gonna gain weight & retain fluid. Ohhh I've worked so hard getting this weight off. But must put it off for a year while I'm on Chemo - Life first then weight.

Please pray that I will tolerate the Chemo fairly well. I know that is an oxymoron. But, one can pray for God to relieve the side effects. That's what I'm praying anyway.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Finally

I finally have an appointment with Dr. Mackey, Oncologist, on Tuesday of next week. Now, we can get things started. So happy:) Scott has been so good to me today. I overdid it big time so he cooked me supper and now is cleaning up the kitchen. Wow, what a MAN!!!!!! I love him so.

I went to the Donald W. Reynolds Cancer Support House today and picked out a wig and got some turbans, hat and bandanna's. Wow, I was so shocked with all the stuff they have there. Counseling, quilting, library, knit & crochet, scrap booking any kind of literature on cancer you could imagine and guess what? IT'S ALL FREE. Wow, people need to utilize their services. They can get you financial help with health care. They are having a "Celebration for Cancer Survivors" Saturday and I plan on going if I can get a ride. Because I am NOT DRIVING!!!!!

The third leg of the triple crown is Saturday. Going to have a good time with family. Life is good.

Waiting & Waiting

I'm still waiting for an appointment with Dr. Mackey, Oncologist. I'm not good at waiting. I'm just so ready to get the Chemo started so I can get it over with. My incision still hurts some. I'm going to have lunch with my good friend Trish and then I'm going to go the the Cancer Support House to check things out. Looking forward to that. I've received some good handbooks on Breast Cancer, Chemo Treatments and Nutrition from our insurance companies. They have been so helpful. I had no idea that they even had such information, I thought all they did was approve or deny your medical claims. Who knew?

I'm sitting here hoping that we get some more rain this morning. We need it so. It's so dry. But this is so normal for our part of the world. So, pray for rain so we can have a good hay crop this year.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Daughter-In-Law's

Yesterday was such an awesome day. I got to go with Chelsea, Jesse's fiance, and her Mom to look at Wedding Dresses. Chelsea found a beautiful gown. I feel so blessed that both my Sons have found beautiful and loving girls. Beth also included me when she went searching for the perfect wedding dress. Wow, I feel so loved. My Mom has agreed to help me make a dress that I can wear to both weddings. We're going to have fun doing that together. My Mom is so good to me.

I go to the Surgeon tomorrow to get the remaining staples removed. I'm praying that they have an appointment for me with Dr. Mackey (Oncologist). I'm so ready to get this started so it will be over sooner.



Sunday, May 30, 2010

Sunday, a day of rest.

I went to church today. What a sermon. Bro. Bob was preaching from Philippians 1. It was right on the mark. God doesn't make bad things happen to us he just allows them to happen so we can glorify his kingdom. I've believed this from the beginning of my diagnosis. We all have testimonies. Are you using yours? I'm blessed to have several. :)

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Hopefully I'll find out next week when I go see the oncologist. I'm ready to start this chemo and get it over with.

Finding out I had cancer was a shock. Not only because of how it was going to effect me but also how it was going to effect my family. Scott and I are getting ready to remodel my Mom's house completely and then move in with her so we all can become debt free. Them bam "I have Breast Cancer." Well, we're not going to let this stop us. We have had to scale our plans down a bit. But, we are going to get city water ditch started later next week or early the following week. Those of you who know the situation - this seems like a miricle. My Papaw built this house in the 1960's and the well water is well, lets just say it's the most horrible stuff ever. Can you imagine Mamaw & Papaw's place having city water. Miricle indeed. Got one bid yesterday on the remodel job. So much higher than we were hoping so, we'll continue to get more bids. Never take the first one that comes along. Shop around for best deal and best contractor.
May 17, I had a Bilateral Mastectomy. Surgery proceedure not all that bad, but emotionally - well it's hard to explain. My cancer is Stage 2A, Invasive Duct Carcinoma (IDC). The tumor was just over 3 cm. The size indicates that I've had this for 8 - 10 years. Can't say enough about regular Mamogram's and doing self exams on a monthly basis. This could save your life.